Nilah Nilah

Sometimes things happen that cannot be explained.

Now you might already know how much I want to understand people. How the mind works, what makes us human, how to predict behavior. I read and study, I share my findings and insights, I teach and write about it. It is a complex topic, one I will never master completely – but it us what I do, it’s my passion, and my job.

And then.

A couple of years ago I went to a birthday party – one of those things where I didn’t expect to know anyone expect the birthday-girl. An introvert’s nightmare. Normally I’d rather just stay home, but I went anyway, somehow.

Now you should know that I have always been crap at relationships. A romantic soul, with high expectations, and big dreams. And single most of the time. Not an ideal combination. I tried to convince myself that I was doing just fine by myself – and didn’t fool anyone. But it was what it was, and I was quite convinced it would stay that way.

Back to the party. I was sitting quietly at the bar, observing people, when all of a sudden I found myself in deep conversation with the nicest, warmest, funniest, most intelligent and interesting man. (How did that happen?) Still – I didn’t think much of it. Nothing to do with me. But a LinkedIn request (really!) and numerous emails later, we met for a first real date – and it was like we had known each other for ever. I never told anyone so much about myself in such a short time.

There were so many reasons this shouldn’t have worked. With the relationship history and injuries we had both collected over the years, we should have been making each other’s lives miserable. I was already in my forties and he in his fifties. But we were happy. We just clicked. I wish there were some life lessons to draw from this that I could share with you, but there aren’t.

We continued meeting until one day we couldn’t not start a relationship with each other. So we did.

We continued the relationship until one day we couldn’t not live together. So we did.

And this week a year ago, we got married. A small, intimate celebration with just our inner circle of friends and family – exactly what we wanted. A day filled with love, laughter and great food.

So miracles do happen. Sometimes you don’t have to understand things. They will just magically happen to you. Just like a lottery, you don’t even have to believe in it.

I wish you all lots of magic. And a happy anniversary to my hubby!